Wednesday, May 27, 2015

47th Annual Wild Game Feed

New Post on May 30, 2018.  50th Annual Wild Game Feed.

New Post on June 23, 2017.  49th Annual Wild Game Feed.

New Post on June 1, 2016.  48th Annual Wild Game Feed.

Okay.  It’s that time of year when anticipation just isn’t enough to keep me satisfied.  I need the real thing, and I need it NOW!  But like everyone else, I have to wait a little longer for the 2015 Annual Wild Game Feed at Irvine Lake.  It’s not going to happen until the third Friday in September.  That means September 18, 2015.

Today my ticket order form arrived in the mail, and it is already filled out, sealed in an envelope, and ready to drop in the mail (as soon as I post this).  No hesitation allowed.  I talk to people every year who waited a couple of weeks to return their order form only to find discover this grand feast is sold out.  If you’ve got an order form send it in immediately or plan on waiting another year.

The AWGF is absolutely the best event of its type I have ever attended.  The food doesn’t end until the sun goes down.  Even then I manage to take a bit home to enjoy another day.  And it’s a bottomless beer mug event.  This is a dream come true—too much beer and too much food all in one place.  One of the things I always laugh about each year is how we stuff ourselves on appetizers of wild game sausages, chili, buffalo ribs, frog legs, clams, salmon, halibut, gumbo, spit roasted pig, quail, game hen, crawfish, tamales, and a bunch of other stuff like corn on the cob, quail, chucker, and calimari, only to have dinner served.  And who can pass up stacks of venison, buffalo, antelope, caribou, elk, boar, alligator, ostrich, duck, sea bass, and who knows what else.  Of course, it’s all washed down with more beer (or soda—your choice).

On top of that there are events, exhibits, and raffles.  Events have included a Sportsman’s Challenge in Target Shooting, Casting, and Archery.  Exhibits have included a large display by Safari Club International, and Live Birds of Prey.  Raffles are endless, and special raffles have included cars, motorcycles, and hunting dogs.  Grand prizes usually include shotguns, rifles, rods and reels, big screen televisions, and barbecues, as well as high-end hunting and fishing equipment.  And for those needing something else to do, how about some volleyball or horseshoes.

For the 1,500 or so men (stag only and 21 or older) who gather together for this event, there is a strange bonding.  We all become instant friends, and we remain friends whether or not we ever met at the Feed.  Over the years, I’ve encountered men under various circumstances outside of the Feed and the subject of the AWGF came up.  Since we had both attended in the past, there was a sudden understanding between us that only friends can have.  And that is the point.  No matter who we are, or where we came from, the Feed unites us as friends.  Just recently I encountered a gentleman who had moved out of the area and had not been able to attend in more than 25 years.  We have almost nothing in common other than past attendance, but we became instant friends.  And he plans to be there this coming September.

All of this is great fun, but it is for charities this event exists.  Many charitable organizations benefit from the monies raised by the Annual Wild Game Feed.  I know the ticket is a bit pricey, but it’s worth every penny and then some.  Hope to see you there.

Friday, May 1, 2015

Memorandum

Recently I opened an old reference book I used for many years while working as an accountant.  An inserted page fell out and many old memories returned.

About twenty-five or thirty years ago I was working for a small company where the owner was, uh, well, not my favorite person.  The hours were long and most were without compensation.  Breaks of any kind were not allowed.  Speaking to another employee was a firing offence.  And DO NOT be caught on the phone, even if one’s job was to answer the phone.  Fortunately the owner was usually not in the office. 

I developed a good working relationship with the owner of a vendor company, and began to realize she understood full well the circumstances where I was employed.  One day she asked me if I had already received my daily beating.  I laughed, but the thought stayed with me.  After a few days had passed, I had a very slow afternoon and wrote the following memorandum.  After sharing it with the vendor company owner, I tucked a copy away in my reference book where it remained all these years.  I didn’t forget about the memorandum I wrote, I just forgot about where I had placed it. 

In another job I was required to make sales and deliver product to various customers around the city.  In several offices, backrooms, break rooms, and work areas belonging to these customers, I encountered copies of the memorandum I had shared with the vendor at my previous company.  I occasionally wondered if any company had ever actually adopted it.


M E M O R A N D U M

TO:  ALL EMPLOYEES

FROM:  MANAGEMENT

RE:  COMPANY BEATINGS

Management has listened to your complaints about the company beating policy and has decided several changes to the policy are in order.

1.     Merit beatings will be eliminated; however, random beatings will be increased in order to create a more even distribution among all workers.
2.     Weekly beatings will now be alphabetically rather than by seniority.
3.     Any employee who misses the weekly beating must make up for the missed beating with two beatings on personal time.
4.     All employees must submit to beatings both before and after filing any complaint.
5.     New job applicants will be test beaten.  Any applicant failing the test will be beaten until satisfactory results are achieved.
6.     Voluntary beatings must now be by appointment only.  Friends and other non-employees will no longer be allowed to participate.
7.     Any employee failing to comply with the new beating policy will be beaten.
8.     The improvement of morale at work may result in fewer beatings, although they will not be eliminated in order to serve as a reminder of what happens when morale is low.

Please continue to express your concerns to management.  We pride ourselves in our ability to respond to our employees’ needs.